Three Questions to unlock your authentic career: Ashley Stahl at TEDxBerkeley

TEDx Talks
23 Feb 201409:51
EducationalLearning
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TLDRIn this inspiring speech, the speaker shares her journey from working in counter-terrorism and the Pentagon to becoming a career coach. She emphasizes the importance of aligning one's career with their true identity rather than just pursuing a passion. The speaker introduces three key questions that helped her find her authentic career: 'What am I good at?', 'What do people tell me I'm good at?', and 'What's holding me back?'. She encourages the audience to consider these questions and to seek help when needed, highlighting the significance of understanding one's natural talents and overcoming limiting thoughts to unlock a fulfilling career.

Takeaways
  • 🔍 **Finding Authentic Work**: The speaker emphasizes the importance of aligning one's work with their true self rather than just pursuing a passion.
  • 🌟 **Self-Reflection**: Asking oneself key questions such as 'What am I good at?', 'What do people tell me I'm good at?', and 'What's holding me back?' can unlock one's authentic career.
  • 🚀 **Career Coaching Impact**: The speaker's personal experience with a career coach was transformative, leading to a shift in career from a Pentagon program to a career coach for millennials.
  • 🏆 **Success vs. Passion**: Interest in a subject does not guarantee success in a career with it, highlighting the need to do what one is good at, not just what one loves.
  • 🤔 **Quarter Life Crisis**: The speaker's quarter life crisis led to a period of self-discovery, which is a common experience for many individuals in their 20s.
  • 📈 **Identifying Talents**: Taking inventory of what others say you're good at can reveal natural talents that can be leveraged in one's career.
  • 💼 **Career Overlap**: The speaker's career in counter-terrorism and spying was not just about passion but also about leveraging her skills in a high-stress environment.
  • 🧊 **Handling Conflict**: The realization of being in a career that conflicts with one's identity can be a wake-up call to seek a more authentic path.
  • 👥 **Social Pressure**: The societal pressure to find one's passion can overshadow the importance of understanding and embracing one's true self.
  • 📚 **Education and Skills**: The speaker's experience suggests that the subjects studied in college don't always align with one's career success.
  • 🌈 **Embracing Identity**: The speaker found her true calling by embracing her identity as a career coach, which was more significant than her initial passion.
Q & A

  • At what age was the speaker immersed in the world of spying and counter-terrorism?

    -The speaker was at age 22 when she was completely immersed in the world of spying and counter-terrorism.

  • What was the speaker's initial career aspiration?

    -The speaker's initial career aspiration was to work in the field of political science, specifically in spying and counter-terrorism.

  • Why did the speaker transition from her career in Washington, DC to becoming a career coach?

    -The speaker transitioned to becoming a career coach because she realized that while she loved political science, her true calling and talent was in career coaching.

  • What was the speaker's realization during her quarter life crisis?

    -During her quarter life crisis, the speaker realized that she needed to focus not just on finding work she loved, but also on finding work that aligned with who she was as a person.

  • What was the pivotal moment that made the speaker question her career path?

    -The pivotal moment was when she held a gun for the first time and felt a strong sense of discomfort and fear, realizing that her career, passion, and identity were in conflict.

  • What percentage of the US population hides some part of their identity at work according to the speaker?

    -According to the speaker, 75 percent of the US population hides some part of their identity at work.

  • How did the speaker's career coaching practice begin?

    -The speaker's career coaching practice began after she hired a career coach herself, which fundamentally changed her life and led her to realize her natural talent for coaching.

  • What are the three key questions the speaker believes can help unlock one's authentic career?

    -The three key questions are: 1) What am I good at? 2) What do people tell me I'm good at? 3) What's holding me back?

  • What was the speaker's personal experience with job hunting that revealed her natural talent for career coaching?

    -The speaker attended 90 events and had coffee with 200 people within six weeks, which resulted in three job offers. This experience, along with the advice she gave to friends, led to her realization that she had a talent for career coaching.

  • Why is it important to not be blinded by one's passion according to the speaker?

    -According to the speaker, being blinded by one's passion can lead to overlooking one's true self and natural talents. It's important to understand who you are to find a fulfilling and authentic career.

  • What advice does the speaker give to those who feel stuck in their career?

    -The speaker advises asking oneself the three key questions, talking to friends, professors, or hiring a career coach, and not being afraid to confront and question one's fears and thoughts that may be holding them back.

  • What does the speaker suggest can be done to overcome fear-based thoughts?

    -The speaker suggests keeping a journal for two weeks to record fear-based thoughts, which can then be analyzed and confronted, helping individuals to rise above these thoughts and unlock their authentic career.

Outlines
00:00
😀 Career Transition: From Spy Aspirations to Career Coaching

Ashley reflects on her transition from aspiring to work in national security to becoming a career coach for millennials. She discusses the conflict between pursuing her passion for political science and aligning with her true identity. Ashley shares three key questions that helped her unlock her authentic career: identifying strengths, listening to feedback, and addressing obstacles.

05:01
😀 Recognizing Natural Talents and Skills

Ashley emphasizes the importance of recognizing one's natural talents and skills. She encourages individuals to pay attention to what others acknowledge them for and to introspect on instances where they excel. By focusing on innate abilities rather than solely pursuing passions, individuals can discover rewarding career paths that align with who they are.

😀 Overcoming Limiting Beliefs and Fears

Ashley addresses the prevalence of limiting beliefs and fears that hinder career progression. She urges clients to confront these thoughts by journaling and challenging negative self-perceptions. By recognizing that these thoughts do not define them, individuals can unlock their authentic career paths and pursue fulfilling opportunities.

Mindmap
Keywords
💡Career Coaching
Career coaching is a professional service that helps individuals to identify their skills, interests, and values in order to find a fulfilling career path. In the video, the speaker transitions from a career in counter-terrorism to becoming a career coach, emphasizing the importance of aligning one's work with their authentic self.
💡Quarter Life Crisis
A quarter life crisis is a period of uncertainty and emotional turmoil that can occur in one's twenties, often related to career and life direction. The speaker mentions going through a quarter life crisis, which led to their decision to hire a career coach and ultimately change careers.
💡Authentic Career
An authentic career refers to a job or profession that is in alignment with an individual's true self, including their passions, skills, and values. The video discusses the concept of finding an authentic career as a key to personal fulfillment and professional success.
💡Passion vs. Skills
The distinction between passion and skills is highlighted in the video. While passion can drive interest in a subject, skills are what ensure success in a career. The speaker advises not to solely focus on passion but to also consider one's abilities and what others recognize as one's strengths.
💡Self-Reflection
Self-reflection is the process of examining one's own thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. The video emphasizes the importance of self-reflection in identifying what one is good at and what might be holding them back, which is crucial for career development.
💡Identity at Work
Identity at work refers to how an individual presents themselves in a professional environment, which can sometimes involve hiding aspects of their personal identity. The speaker discusses the challenge of hiding parts of her identity in her previous career and how this realization contributed to her career change.
💡Fear-Based Thoughts
Fear-based thoughts are negative, anxiety-provoking ideas that can hinder personal growth and success. The video suggests that recognizing and confronting these thoughts can help individuals overcome barriers and move forward in their careers.
💡Emotional Backpack
The term 'emotional backpack' metaphorically refers to the emotional baggage or unresolved issues that one carries with them. In the context of the video, the speaker encourages the audience to open their 'emotional backpack' to confront and understand their fears and insecurities.
💡Repeat Offender Thoughts
Repeat offender thoughts are recurring negative thoughts that can limit one's potential. The video cites research from UCLA that suggests up to 98% of our thoughts are repetitive, and many of these could be holding us back in our careers.
💡Networking
Networking is the process of building and maintaining professional relationships. The speaker mentions attending events and having coffee with people as part of her job search strategy, which led to multiple job offers and highlighted her natural talent for career coaching.
💡Self-Identity
Self-identity is the understanding and perception of oneself. The video stresses the importance of knowing one's self-identity in choosing a career. The speaker's realization of her true identity as a career coach was a pivotal moment in her professional journey.
Highlights

At age 22, the speaker was immersed in a world of spying and counter-terrorism, which was her fantasy career.

The speaker transitioned from working in Washington, DC to becoming a career coach for millennials.

The importance of balancing finding work one loves with work that aligns with one's identity.

The speaker's personal experience with a quarter-life crisis and the transformative impact of hiring a career coach.

Three key questions that helped the speaker unlock her authentic career: what am I good at, what do people say I'm good at, and what's holding me back.

The challenge of aligning interests with career success and the need to focus on skills, not just passions.

The speaker's experience as the only woman and youngest employee in her firm, feeling the pressure to prove herself.

A pivotal moment where holding a gun made the speaker question her career path and identity.

The realization that 75% of the US population hides parts of their identity at work, indicating the speaker was not alone.

The decision to seek help from a career coach as a turning point in the speaker's professional journey.

The second key question's focus on identifying one's natural talents through feedback from others.

The speaker's natural talent for job hunting and how it led to a career coaching epiphany.

The empowerment and clarity the speaker experienced from helping friends with their career paths.

The final key question asks individuals to confront what might be holding them back in their careers.

The prevalence of negative, repetitive thoughts and their potential to limit career growth.

The suggestion to keep a journal to identify and overcome fear-based thoughts that hinder progress.

The importance of recognizing that one is not defined by their thoughts and the power of self-awareness.

The speaker's personal revelation at the Pentagon that led to her questioning her true self and career path.

Encouragement to ask oneself the three key questions when feeling stuck in one's career.

The value of seeking advice and engaging in dialogue to embrace a fulfilling career.

Transcripts

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Career CoachingPassion vs. SelfIdentity CrisisProfessional GrowthWork-Life BalanceMillennialsLeadershipSelf-DiscoveryEmpowermentPersonal DevelopmentNational SecurityWashington DCLos AngelesQuarter Life CrisisEmotional IntelligenceJob SearchNetworkingPublic SpeakingSelf-ReflectionFear ManagementMindset ShiftBerkeley Speech