Lingering Porn Thoughts: How to get Rid of Flashbacks for Good (w/Dr. Trish Leigh)
TLDRDr. Trish Lee addresses the issue of lingering pornographic thoughts and offers a strategy to overcome them. She explains that memory is not about the length of time since an experience, but the accumulation of new experiences that can overwrite old ones. By engaging in inspiring work, nurturing relationships, and pursuing hobbies, one can fill their 'mental cup' with positive thoughts, pushing out the unwanted pornographic memories. Dr. Lee emphasizes the importance of Hebb's law, 'neurons that fire together wire together,' and encourages individuals to create new neural pathways for mood regulation through healthy activities instead of relying on porn. She provides a personal example of how she maintains a healthy mindset through daily exercise and meaningful interactions. The video concludes with an invitation to reach out to Dr. Lee for further assistance.
Takeaways
- π§ **Memory Concept**: Memory is not about the length of time since an experience, but the amount of new information that has been added to the brain since then.
- π **Forgetting Process**: To forget old memories, like those of porn, one must fill the mind with new, healthy thoughts and experiences.
- π‘ **Neural Pathways**: Repeatedly using certain neural pathways strengthens them, while introducing new activities can create new pathways and weaken old ones.
- π **Cup Analogy**: The mind is likened to a cup filled with porn thoughts; new, positive inputs cause the old thoughts to spill out.
- π **Inspiring Work**: Engaging in work that inspires and excites you can help crowd out negative thoughts with positive, productive ones.
- π¨βπ©βπ§βπ¦ **Healthy Relationships**: Nurturing relationships that bring joy and support can contribute to a healthier mental state and reduce reliance on negative coping mechanisms.
- πΎ **Pursuing Hobbies**: Taking up new hobbies or interests can provide a positive outlet for the brain's reward system, replacing old habits with new, healthier ones.
- π **Physical Activity**: Regular exercise, such as walking or running, can help regulate mood and clear the mind of unwanted thoughts.
- π **Morning Routine**: Establishing a positive morning routine can set the tone for a day filled with healthy thoughts and activities.
- π§ **Mindful Regulation**: Recognizing that porn thoughts are often a form of mood regulation, and consciously choosing healthier alternatives is crucial.
- π« **Avoiding Temptation**: When a porn thought arises, immediately redirect the mind to something else to prevent the neural pathway from firing and strengthening.
- π **Reach Out**: For those seeking help, reaching out to a professional like Dr. Trish Lee can provide guidance and support tailored to individual needs.
Q & A
What is the main concept Dr. Trish Lee discusses in the video?
-The main concept discussed is memory and how it is affected by the amount of new information that enters the brain after a certain experience or incident, rather than the length of time since that experience.
How does Dr. Trish Lee explain the process of forgetting unwanted memories?
-She explains that to forget unwanted memories, one should fill their mind with new, healthy thoughts and experiences, which will cause the old memories to fade away as they are not being reinforced by neural pathways.
What is the analogy Dr. Trish Lee uses to describe the process of memory?
-She uses the analogy of a cup that is filled with porn thoughts and memories. To get rid of these, one should pour new, healthy thoughts into the cup, causing the old thoughts to spill over and dissipate.
What are the three areas Dr. Trish Lee suggests focusing on to fill the 'cup' with new thoughts?
-The three areas she suggests are work, relationships, and hobbies. Engaging in inspiring work, nurturing relationships that feed you, and pursuing hobbies can help fill the mind with positive thoughts.
How does Dr. Trish Lee relate porn thoughts to mood regulation?
-She suggests that when a porn thought arises, it's not necessarily about sexual desire but rather a brain's attempt to regulate mood, possibly to alleviate anxiety. Healthy work, relationships, and hobbies can serve as better mood regulators.
What is Hebb's law and how does it apply to the process of forgetting unwanted thoughts?
-Hebb's law states that 'neurons that fire together wire together.' In the context of forgetting unwanted thoughts, it means that if one does not engage with the porn thought, the neural pathways associated with it will not be reinforced and will gradually weaken.
What is the importance of firing up the brain on purpose?
-Firing up the brain on purpose is important because it helps create new neural pathways and reinforces new, healthy thoughts, which in turn pushes out the unwanted thoughts and contributes to a healthier mental state.
Why does Dr. Trish Lee emphasize the need to avoid engaging with unwanted thoughts?
-Engaging with unwanted thoughts, such as porn thoughts, reinforces the neural pathways associated with them, making them more likely to persist. By avoiding engagement, the neural pathways are not fired up, and these thoughts gradually fade.
How does Dr. Trish Lee suggest one can replace porn thoughts with healthier alternatives?
-She suggests that when a porn thought arises, one should immediately push it away and instead focus on something else, like the rules of a hobby like pickleball, to associate the dopamine rush with a healthier activity.
What is the role of physical activity in Dr. Trish Lee's strategy for brain health?
-Physical activity, such as going for walks or runs, is part of a morning routine that helps keep the brain in a great spot. It contributes to mood regulation and provides a healthy alternative to using porn for mood relief.
What does Dr. Trish Lee mean when she says 'control your brain or it'll control you'?
-This means that if you actively engage in managing your thoughts and choosing what to focus on, you can prevent unwanted thoughts from taking over. If you don't take control, these thoughts can dictate your mental state and behavior.
Outlines
π§ Overcoming Unwanted Memories
Dr. Trish Lee discusses techniques to eliminate unwanted pornographic thoughts by understanding memory dynamics. She explains that memory relies on the amount of new information processed rather than the time elapsed. To forget unwanted memories, one must replace them with new, healthy thoughts. This can be achieved by actively engaging the brain through work, relationships, and hobbies, which help overwrite old neural pathways with beneficial ones. She uses the analogy of a cup filled with porn thoughts being emptied by pouring in new content.
π Replacing Negative Thoughts with Positive Activities
The video emphasizes replacing harmful pornographic thoughts with healthy activities such as sports, relationships, and hobbies. Dr. Lee explains that engaging in positive activities like pickleball, skiing, or having meaningful relationships helps in mood regulation, which is often the underlying reason people turn to pornography. She references Hebb's law to suggest that forming new, healthy neural connections will naturally displace the old, harmful ones, encouraging viewers to focus on filling their lives with enriching experiences and thoughts.
Mindmap
Keywords
π‘Memory
π‘Neural Pathways
π‘Hebb's Law
π‘Mood Regulation
π‘Healthy Work
π‘Healthy Relationships
π‘Hobbies
π‘Dopamine
π‘Anxiety
π‘Inspiration
π‘Control
Highlights
Memory is not determined by the length of time since an experience, but by the amount of new information added to the brain since then.
To forget something, fill your mind with new, healthy thoughts and experiences to replace the old ones.
Use an analogy of a cup filled with porn thoughts - pour new, positive experiences into the cup to displace the old thoughts.
Engage in inspiring work, fulfilling relationships, and enjoyable hobbies to fill your mind with positive thoughts.
When a porn thought arises, don't entertain it. Instead, immediately shift your focus to a new, positive thought.
Hebb's Law: Neurons that fire together wire together. Create new neural pathways for mood regulation by associating positive experiences with dopamine hits.
Porn thoughts often serve as a form of mood regulation, not sexual desire. Find healthier ways to regulate your mood.
Dr. Trish shares her personal experiences with inspiring work, laughter-filled family time, and hobbies like pickleball.
Having close relationships that bring you joy and fulfillment is crucial for a healthy mind.
When a porn thought enters your mind, push it away and replace it with something positive, like researching pickleball rules.
Dr. Trish emphasizes the importance of controlling your own thoughts and not letting them control you.
She offers programs and support to help individuals on their journey to a healthier mind at drischlee.com.
The key takeaway from Dr. Trish's graduate course on memory was the importance of continually reinforcing and replacing memories.
Memories fade when other thoughts and experiences take their place in your mind.
Dr. Trish's personal morning routine includes going for walks in nature, which fills her mind with positive, soul-nourishing thoughts.
She emphasizes the power of daily exercise and a morning routine in keeping the brain in a great state.
Old porn thoughts will naturally die off if you don't reinforce them with new experiences.
Transcripts
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