How To Make People Respect You If You're Quiet

Charisma on Command
6 Jun 202209:10
EducationalLearning
32 Likes 10 Comments

TLDRThe video script explores the character of Tommy Shelby from the TV show 'Peaky Blinders', focusing on the habits that make him a respected and charismatic figure. It highlights Tommy's slow and relaxed movements, his ability to maintain eye contact during conflict, and his non-reactive demeanor as key to his commanding presence. The script also emphasizes the importance of body language in large groups, the conviction in one's word choice and tone, and the strategic use of pauses for impact. Tommy's quiet confidence is attributed to his deep understanding of people's desires and fears, which he uses to his advantage. The video concludes with a discussion on how to apply these traits to real-life situations, such as negotiating a raise or promotion, and introduces a program called 'Charisma University' to help viewers build their own confidence and charisma.

Takeaways
  • 🐒 Tommy Shelby's slow and relaxed movements convey a sense of confidence and non-intimidation.
  • πŸ‘€ Holding eye contact during conflict can signal confidence, but breaking it at the right moment can de-escalate tension.
  • 😐 Being non-reactive to hostility demonstrates self-assurance and respect, even in tense situations.
  • πŸ” Tommy's thorough research on his enemies allows him to project confidence, as he is prepared for various scenarios.
  • πŸ€— Using large and expressive hand gestures when speaking to a group can command more attention.
  • πŸ—£οΈ Speaking with conviction, using assertive language like 'I will' instead of 'I want to' or 'I hope to', demonstrates certainty.
  • ↗️ Avoid ending statements with an upward inflection, which can make you sound unsure.
  • 🎀 A slow speaking cadence and strategic pauses can hold the audience's attention and emphasize your points.
  • πŸ“‰ Using a downward inflection at the end of sentences can convey a sense of finality and confidence.
  • πŸ’₯ Tommy's quiet words carry weight because he knows what others want or fear, giving him significant influence.
  • πŸ₯• Applying 'carrot and stick' motivation in a non-threatening way can be persuasive in personal or professional negotiations.
Q & A
  • What is one of the key body language habits of Tommy Shelby that can help command respect?

    -One of Tommy Shelby's key body language habits is moving slowly and comfortably, which gives the impression that he is not easily intimidated or pressured.

  • How does Tommy Shelby use eye contact to project confidence?

    -Tommy Shelby is comfortable holding eye contact, especially during conflict, which signals confidence and a lack of intimidation.

  • What is the significance of Tommy Shelby's non-reactive behavior in high-pressure situations?

    -Tommy Shelby's non-reactive behavior in high-pressure situations demonstrates his internal confidence and his ability to handle whatever is happening, which earns him respect.

  • How does Tommy Shelby's research on his enemies contribute to his confidence?

    -By researching his enemies, Tommy Shelby is well-prepared and knows how to handle them, which contributes to his confidence and non-reactivity under pressure.

  • What is the impact of using big hand gestures when speaking to a large group, as Tommy Shelby does?

    -Using big hand gestures when speaking to a large group, as Tommy Shelby does, helps to command attention and assertiveness.

  • How does Tommy Shelby's word choice reflect his conviction?

    -Tommy Shelby's word choice, such as using 'I will' instead of 'I hope to' or 'I want to', shows his conviction and determination.

  • Why is it important for Tommy Shelby to speak with a slow cadence and use pauses?

    -Speaking with a slow cadence and using pauses allows Tommy Shelby to hold attention and emphasize important points, making his words carry more weight.

  • How does Tommy Shelby's quiet demeanor contribute to the weight of his words?

    -Tommy Shelby's quiet demeanor, combined with his knowledge of what others want or fear, makes his words carry significant weight without the need to raise his voice.

  • What is the 'carrot and stick' approach that Tommy Shelby uses to wield power over people?

    -The 'carrot and stick' approach involves using both rewards (carrot) and threats (stick) to motivate and control people, a technique Tommy Shelby employs effectively.

  • How can one apply the 'carrot and stick' approach in a professional context, such as asking for a raise?

    -In a professional context, one can apply the 'carrot and stick' approach by demonstrating value and setting clear goals for a raise, while also having alternative job offers as leverage if the request is not met.

  • What is the key to building genuine internal confidence, as suggested by the video?

    -The key to building genuine internal confidence is through a proper game plan and practices, such as those offered in the Charisma University program, which can significantly boost confidence in a short period.

  • How has the Charisma University program impacted the lives of its members, according to their testimonials?

    -The Charisma University program has helped its members improve their social skills, secure promotions, make more friends, and increase their self-esteem, leading to a significant positive change in their lives.

Outlines
00:00
πŸ˜€ Tommy Shelby's Charismatic Leadership

The first paragraph discusses the character of Tommy Shelby from the TV show 'Peaky Blinders', highlighting his introverted yet charismatic nature. It suggests eight habits viewers can learn from Tommy to command more respect. The video promises to apply psychological insights from the show to real-life situations, starting with Tommy's slow and relaxed movements, which convey a sense of confidence and lack of intimidation. Holding eye contact during conflict is another habit that helps him appear confident. However, the video advises against constant eye contact, as it can escalate tension. Instead, it suggests holding eye contact for a few seconds before breaking it to the side. Tommy's non-reactivity, especially in hostile situations, is a key aspect of his ability to command respect. The paragraph also touches upon his research habits and the importance of genuine internal confidence, which will be further discussed later in the video.

05:00
πŸ“’ Commanding Respect Through Speech and Body Language

The second paragraph delves into the importance of body language and speech in commanding respect, particularly in the context of addressing larger groups. It emphasizes the impact of large hand gestures and a powerful speaking presence. The paragraph also discusses Tommy's conviction in his word choice, especially when discussing his plans, using the word 'will' instead of 'want to' or 'hope to'. The tone of voice is highlighted as a method to convey conviction, recommending a downward inflection at the end of statements to appear assertive. Tommy's slow speaking cadence and strategic use of pauses are noted as effective techniques to hold attention. The paragraph further explains that Tommy's quiet words carry weight due to his knowledge of what others desire or fear. It provides a strategy for applying 'carrot and stick' motivation in a professional context, such as negotiating a raise or promotion. The video concludes with a promotion for 'Charisma University', a program designed to enhance confidence and charisma, and includes testimonials from past members who have experienced significant improvements in their professional and social lives.

Mindmap
Keywords
πŸ’‘Introverted
Introverted refers to a personality type that is more focused on internal thoughts and feelings rather than external stimuli. In the video, Tommy Shelby is described as quiet and introverted, yet he is able to command respect and attention, demonstrating that introversion can coexist with strong leadership qualities.
πŸ’‘Charismatic
Charisma is a personal quality that makes someone able to inspire and attract others. Tommy Shelby is described as extremely charismatic despite his introverted nature. This shows that charisma is not solely based on extroversion but also on the ability to connect and influence others effectively.
πŸ’‘Slow Relaxed Movements
This phrase describes a body language habit where one moves slowly and without appearing rushed. Tommy is noted for his slow, relaxed movements, which convey a sense of confidence and lack of intimidation. It's a non-verbal cue that he is in control and not easily pressured.
πŸ’‘Eye Contact
Eye contact is the act of looking into someone's eyes and is a form of non-verbal communication. Tommy's ability to hold eye contact, especially during conflict, is highlighted as a sign of confidence and lack of fear. It's a powerful tool for showing that one is not intimidated and is assertive.
πŸ’‘Non-reactive
Being non-reactive means not responding impulsively or emotionally to a situation. Tommy's non-reactivity is showcased as a key to his ability to command respect. It demonstrates his internal confidence and his ability to stay calm under pressure, which is a trait that earns him the respect of others.
πŸ’‘Researching Enemies
This concept refers to the act of gathering information about one's adversaries. In the context of the video, Tommy's thorough research of his enemies is mentioned as a reason for his confidence. It implies that knowledge and preparation can contribute to a person's ability to remain composed and respected.
πŸ’‘Word Choice
Word choice involves the selection of words to convey a message clearly and effectively. Tommy's use of assertive language, such as 'I will' instead of 'I hope to' or 'I want to', is emphasized. It shows conviction and determination, which are key to commanding respect.
πŸ’‘Tone
Tone refers to the manner in which something is expressed, often in terms of the speaker's attitude or emotion. Tommy's tone is described as a tool for showing conviction. A downward inflection at the end of statements, as opposed to an upward one, is suggested to convey certainty and strength.
πŸ’‘Speaking Cadence
Speaking cadence is the rhythm of speech, including the pace and pauses. Tommy's slow speaking cadence and strategic pauses are used to hold attention and convey importance. This technique can make the speaker seem more thoughtful and in control, thus commanding respect.
πŸ’‘Carrot and Stick Motivation
This is a motivational technique where 'carrot' represents a reward and 'stick' represents a punishment. Tommy is said to wield tremendous power over people using this approach. In the video, it's suggested that understanding what others want or fear can be a powerful tool for influencing them.
πŸ’‘Internal Confidence
Internal confidence refers to a person's self-assurance that comes from within, rather than external validation. The video suggests that building genuine internal confidence is crucial for projecting a commanding presence like Tommy's. It is linked to the ability to execute plans and to negotiate effectively.
Highlights

Tommy Shelby from 'Peaky Blinders' is admired for his quiet, introverted nature and charismatic leadership.

Eight habits from Tommy's character can help command more respect in everyday life.

Psychological principles from the show apply to real-life situations.

Tommy's slow, relaxed movements convey a sense of non-intimidation.

Holding eye contact during conflict without flinching can show confidence.

Tommy's non-reactivity to hostility is a key factor in his ability to command respect.

Researching enemies, as Tommy does, helps in maintaining composure under pressure.

Using larger hand gestures when speaking to a large group can command attention.

Tommy's word choice and tone convey conviction and confidence.

Ending statements with a downward inflection instead of an upward one can project certainty.

Tommy's slow speaking cadence and strategic pauses hold listeners' attention.

Tommy doesn't need to raise his voice due to the weight his words carry.

Understanding what others want or fear can give one significant power in negotiations.

Carrot-stick motivation, as used by Tommy, can be applied positively in real-life scenarios.

Confidence can be developed faster than most people think with the right approach.

Charisma University is a program that can significantly boost one's confidence and charisma.

The program includes a guarantee to change one's life or provide a full refund.

Testimonials from past members of Charisma University show significant improvements in social skills and self-assurance.

Transcripts
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