Everyone Provides Kinship Care | Adrian McLemore | TEDxDayton
TLDRThe speaker shares personal experiences with the foster care system and kinship care, emphasizing the latter as a preferable solution. From being placed in foster care at a young age due to family crises to later providing care for his niece and nephew, the speaker highlights the transformative impact of these experiences. He underscores the importance of community and family support in raising children, advocating for kinship care as a way to maintain familial bonds and prevent the separation of siblings.
Takeaways
- 📞 Growing up in the foster care system and providing kinship care has shaped the speaker's life.
- 🏠 Kinship care, where family members or friends take care of children, is highlighted as a better solution than foster care.
- 👶 The speaker's first 9-1-1 call was made when he was four years old after being abandoned by his parents.
- 🚔 The speaker was placed in foster care at six years old, a traumatic experience that he vividly remembers.
- ❤️ The speaker emphasizes the importance of foster families and appreciates those who consider becoming foster parents.
- 🛠️ Foster care is temporary and changes individuals, often leaving lasting impacts.
- 🌍 Kinship care, rooted in the concept of 'it takes a village,' is presented as a more stable and nurturing alternative.
- 👩👦 The speaker had to take in his niece and nephew, transforming his life from a college student to a full-time caregiver.
- 🌟 Kinship care requires kindness, being informed, and flexibility to adapt to various challenges.
- 🤝 Everyone can be a kinship care provider in their own way, contributing to the well-being of children in the community.
Q & A
What was the first 9-1-1 call made by the speaker about?
-The first 9-1-1 call was made by neighbors reporting a four-year-old African-American boy, the speaker, found alone in the street crying and screaming, after his parents had left him unattended.
Why was the speaker placed in the foster care system?
-The speaker was placed in the foster care system because his mother faced significant challenges after moving to Georgia, and a decision was made that social services could not resolve their family issues.
How did the speaker feel when he was taken to his first foster home?
-The speaker was initially afraid and alone, imagining that he was being kidnapped and fearing for his life, especially when he saw grave markers on the way to the foster home.
What misconception did the speaker have about his first foster family?
-The speaker initially thought that his foster family was going to kill him and bury him among the graves, but he later found out that the Luke's were a great foster family.
What are the two main perspectives the speaker shares about his life being shaped by crisis?
-The two perspectives are growing up in the foster care system and providing kinship care to his niece and nephew.
What is the speaker's opinion on kinship care compared to foster care?
-The speaker believes that kinship care is a better way forward because it maintains family relationships and does not separate siblings.
How did the speaker become a kinship care provider?
-The speaker became a kinship care provider when he was 21 years old, after a situation involving his sister and her children, and he decided to take them in to prevent them from being placed in foster care.
What challenges did the speaker face when he started providing kinship care?
-The speaker faced challenges such as being overwhelmed, having to change his lifestyle from a full-time working college student to a full-time uncle dad, and dealing with the emotional stress of caring for young children.
What are the three attributes the speaker believes are necessary for kinship care providers?
-The three attributes are being king (caring), being informed, and being flexible.
What is the main message the speaker wants the audience to take away from his experience with kinship care?
-The main message is that everyone can be a kinship care provider in their own way and that maintaining relationships within communities and families is essential.
How many children are in foster care according to the Ohio Department of Job and Family Services mentioned in the script?
-According to the Ohio Department of Job and Family Services, there are 14,000 children in foster care.
Outlines
🚨 Childhood Crisis and Foster Care Experience
The speaker begins by sharing their personal journey with crisis, starting with a 9-1-1 call made when they were four years old due to family issues. They recount their experience of being placed in the foster care system at the age of six, after their parents' separation and subsequent challenges faced by their mother. The narrative includes the fear and confusion of being taken away by a social worker and the adjustment to a new foster family. The speaker emphasizes the temporary nature of foster care and its transformative impact on their life, advocating for kinship care as a preferable alternative.
👨👧👦 Kinship Care: A Personal and Community Commitment
The speaker transitions to their experience with kinship care, triggered by a call from the sheriff's office regarding their sister's children. At 21, unprepared but determined, they took on the responsibility of caring for their niece and nephew, highlighting the stark contrast between the structured environment of foster care and the challenges of kinship care. They discuss the lack of formal training for kinship caregivers and the importance of community and family support. The speaker shares anecdotes about their struggles and joys in raising the children, emphasizing the value of keeping siblings together and the collective responsibility of the community in raising children.
👏 The Power of Kinship Care in Action
In the final paragraph, the speaker reflects on the broader implications of kinship care, using a personal photograph of their niece and nephew as a symbol of the success of maintaining family bonds. They call upon the audience to consider their potential role in supporting children in need, drawing attention to the significant number of children in foster care and the potential of kinship care to make a difference. The speaker concludes by celebrating the capacity of the community to embrace kinship care, as evidenced by the venue's seating capacity, and encourages everyone to recognize and utilize their inherent abilities to provide care and support.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡9-1-1
💡Foster Care System
💡Kinship Care
💡Crisis
💡Adrienne
💡Luke's
💡Kin Care
💡Uncle Dad
💡Community
💡Ohio Department of Job and Family Services
💡Attributes
Highlights
The speaker shares two perspectives on life shaped by crisis: growing up in the foster care system and providing kinship care to his niece and nephew.
At four years old, the speaker was found alone in the street, leading to social services involvement and eventually being placed in foster care.
The vivid memory of being taken away by a social worker, imagining being kidnapped, and later discovering a caring foster family, the Luke's.
Foster care is not permanent and is intended as a temporary solution to a family crisis, though it can never replace family reunification or adoption.
Foster care changes individuals, giving them unique life perspectives and experiences often unmatched by their peers.
Kinship care, or care provided by relatives or close family friends, is presented as a better alternative to foster care.
Kinship care is part of the concept that 'it takes a village,' rooted in ancient African cultures where the community collectively raised children.
The speaker's personal experience of being asked to take in his niece and nephew when their mother faced issues, highlighting the challenges and responsibilities of kinship care.
Kinship care requires kindness, eagerness, and flexibility, as well as being informed and asking more questions.
The speaker shares a touching moment of trying to do his niece's hair, leading to a compromise that involved her teachers helping out, illustrating the need for flexibility.
A photo of the speaker's niece and nephew, symbolizing the importance of keeping family together and maintaining relationships within communities.
The speaker emphasizes the role everyone can play as teachers, mentors, and kinship care providers, advocating for community involvement.
Statistics from the Ohio Department of Job and Family Services indicate there are 14,000 children in foster care, with 1,100 in the local community.
The speaker's call to action for people to step up and help out one child, highlighting the significant impact it can have on the community.
The importance of maintaining relationships within families and communities to support children and prevent them from being placed with strangers.
Transcripts
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