The skill of self confidence | Dr. Ivan Joseph | TEDxRyersonU
TLDRIn this inspiring talk, a former soccer coach emphasizes the critical role of self-confidence in achieving success. He argues that self-confidence is a skill that can be developed through repetition and persistence, sharing personal anecdotes and strategies such as positive self-talk and affirmations. The speaker also highlights the importance of building others' self-confidence through positive reinforcement, rather than focusing on mistakes. With humor and passion, he encourages the audience to believe in themselves, as no one else will until they do.
Takeaways
- 🏆 The speaker emphasizes the importance of self-confidence as a crucial skill for success in soccer and life, rather than just physical abilities.
- 💰 The speaker humorously points out that winning a national championship does not automatically attract players, but offering scholarships does.
- 🤔 Parents often focus on their children's physical skills, but the speaker argues that self-confidence is what truly makes a player stand out.
- 🔄 Self-confidence is defined as the belief in one's ability to accomplish any task, regardless of the odds or difficulties.
- 🔄 The speaker suggests that self-confidence can be developed and trained, like any other skill, through repetition and persistence.
- 🎯 The speaker shares a personal story about a goalkeeper who improved dramatically through daily practice and repetition.
- 💪 The importance of practicing under pressure is highlighted, as it builds the ability to perform well when it truly matters.
- 🚫 The speaker warns against giving up at the first sign of failure or adversity, citing examples of successful individuals who faced numerous rejections before succeeding.
- 🗣️ The power of self-talk is discussed, with the speaker advising to replace negative self-talk with positive affirmations.
- 👥 The speaker encourages surrounding oneself with positive influences and distancing from those who undermine self-confidence.
- 📝 The concept of writing a self-confidence letter is introduced as a tool for reinforcing one's achievements and boosting self-belief during challenging times.
- 👀 The speaker talks about the impact of how feedback is interpreted, suggesting that self-confident people choose to view feedback positively.
- 👨👧 The speaker shares a personal anecdote about his son's optimistic interpretation of his own performance, illustrating the power of a positive mindset.
Q & A
What is the main message of the speaker regarding self-confidence in soccer players?
-The speaker emphasizes that self-confidence is the most important skill for a soccer player, even more than physical abilities like vision or speed. It is the belief in oneself to accomplish any task, regardless of the odds or adversity.
How does the speaker define self-confidence?
-Self-confidence is defined by the speaker as the ability or belief to believe in oneself to accomplish any task, no matter the difficulty or adversity.
What is the speaker's view on the ability to develop self-confidence?
-The speaker believes that self-confidence is a skill that can be trained and developed through various methods.
What is the first method the speaker suggests to build self-confidence?
-The first method suggested by the speaker to build self-confidence is repetition. This involves practicing a skill over and over again until it becomes second nature.
Can you provide an example from the script where repetition helped build self-confidence?
-The speaker shares the story of a goalkeeper from Colombia who improved his skills by kicking a ball against a wall and catching it 350 times a day for eight months, leading to a professional career in Europe.
What is the second method the speaker discusses for building self-confidence?
-The second method discussed is self-talk. The speaker explains the importance of positive self-affirmations and how negative self-talk can hinder self-confidence.
How does the speaker suggest changing one's self-talk to improve self-confidence?
-The speaker suggests using self-affirmations and focusing on positive thoughts. He shares personal examples, such as his own affirmation 'I am the captain of my ship and the master of my fate!'
What is the importance of persistence in building self-confidence according to the speaker?
-Persistence is highlighted as crucial because it involves continuing to practice and not accepting failure, even after repeated attempts or rejections.
How does the speaker relate the concept of self-confidence to historical figures like Edison and J.K. Rowling?
-The speaker uses Edison's numerous attempts to invent the light bulb and J.K. Rowling's struggle to get her Harry Potter book published to illustrate the importance of persistence and self-confidence in the face of failure.
What is the speaker's advice on dealing with negative self-talk?
-The speaker advises to stop the negative self-talk and replace it with positive affirmations. He suggests writing a self-confidence letter or list of achievements to remind oneself of personal strengths.
How can building self-confidence in others be achieved according to the speaker?
-The speaker suggests that building self-confidence in others can be achieved by focusing on positive reinforcement, praising good behavior, and catching people when they are doing things right.
What is the significance of the 'catch them when they are good' approach mentioned by the speaker?
-This approach is significant because it encourages positive behavior and performance by focusing on what people do right rather than what they do wrong, which can greatly enhance self-confidence.
How does the speaker describe the interpretation of feedback by self-confident people?
-Self-confident people, according to the speaker, choose to interpret feedback in a way that is positive and constructive, even when the feedback might be perceived negatively by others.
What is the final piece of advice the speaker gives regarding self-confidence?
-The speaker's final advice is that no one will believe in you unless you believe in yourself first. He encourages embracing one's uniqueness and having the courage to be different.
Outlines
😀 Building Self-Confidence Through Repetition and Persistence
The speaker, a former soccer coach, emphasizes the importance of self-confidence as a crucial skill for success in sports and life. He argues that self-confidence can be developed and honed through repetition and persistence. Using the example of a goalkeeper from Colombia, he illustrates how consistent practice led to significant improvement and a professional career in Europe. The speaker also discusses the common tendency to give up after initial failures and encourages the audience to persist despite setbacks, drawing parallels to famous figures like Edison and J.K. Rowling who faced numerous rejections before achieving success.
🗣️ The Power of Positive Self-Talk and Affirmations
The speaker delves into the concept of self-talk and its impact on self-confidence. He highlights the negative self-talk that often plagues individuals and suggests replacing it with positive affirmations. Citing examples from his own life and the lives of famous personalities like Muhammad Ali, the speaker advocates for quiet moments of self-affirmation to counteract the negative voices. He also shares a personal strategy of writing a self-confidence letter to oneself, listing personal achievements and strengths to uplift one's spirit during challenging times. The speaker encourages the audience to distance themselves from negativity and to focus on self-affirmations that can foster a strong sense of self-belief.
👨👧👦 Fostering Self-Confidence in Others Through Positive Reinforcement
The speaker discusses the role of coaches, educators, and parents in building self-confidence in others. He suggests that focusing on praising positive behaviors and achievements rather than dwelling on mistakes can significantly boost a person's self-confidence. Using examples from sports coaching and parenting, the speaker illustrates how recognizing and celebrating successes can motivate individuals and enhance their belief in their abilities. He also references a study from Kansas that demonstrates the effectiveness of positive reinforcement in improving team performance. The speaker concludes by emphasizing the importance of catching people when they are good at something and letting them know it, as a means to nurture self-confidence.
🤔 Interpreting Feedback Positively to Enhance Self-Confidence
In the final paragraph, the speaker talks about how self-confident individuals interpret feedback in a way that reinforces their self-belief. He shares anecdotes about his son's optimistic view of his own performance in sports, despite objective evidence to the contrary, and his own experience of interpreting rejection as a potential opportunity. The speaker encourages the audience to adopt a similar mindset, choosing to see feedback as a chance for growth and improvement rather than as a setback. He concludes with a powerful message that no one will believe in an individual unless they believe in themselves first, urging the audience to embrace their uniqueness and to have the courage to be different.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Self-confidence
💡Repetition
💡Persistence
💡Self-talk
💡Self-affirmations
💡Practice
💡Adversity
💡Feedback
💡Interpretation
💡Belief in oneself
Highlights
Winning a national championship does not automatically attract players, contrary to popular belief.
Players are more attracted by scholarships, indicating financial incentives are significant.
The importance of self-confidence in soccer is emphasized, suggesting it's the most crucial skill.
Self-confidence is defined as the belief in one's ability to accomplish tasks despite adversity.
The speaker believes self-confidence is a skill that can be trained, not just an innate trait.
Repetition is highlighted as the key to building self-confidence, referencing the '10,000-hour rule'.
A personal anecdote about a goalie from Colombia illustrates the power of repetition in skill development.
The concept that familiarity with a task can reduce nervousness and increase self-confidence is discussed.
The speaker shares his personal experience with public speaking and how practice reduces anxiety.
Persistence is presented as a critical component of building self-confidence, especially in the face of failure.
The importance of positive self-talk in fostering self-confidence is emphasized.
Negative self-talk and its impact on self-confidence are discussed, with examples provided.
The use of self-affirmations, like Muhammad Ali's 'I am the greatest', is suggested as a method to boost self-confidence.
The speaker recommends writing a self-confidence letter to oneself, listing personal achievements.
The impact of others' negative feedback on self-confidence and the importance of surrounding oneself with positivity are highlighted.
A study from Kansas is mentioned, showing the effectiveness of focusing on positive behaviors rather than mistakes.
The speaker suggests that coaches and educators should 'catch people when they are good' to build self-confidence.
The interpretation of feedback by self-confident individuals is discussed, emphasizing a positive outlook.
The final message is a call to believe in oneself, as no one else will unless you do.
Transcripts
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