In my chair -- a makeup artists perspective on beauty: Eva DeVirgilis at TEDxRVAWomen

TEDx Talks
29 Jan 201410:52
EducationalLearning
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TLDRThe video script is a poignant narrative by a makeup artist and actress who has spent seven years observing a common theme among her clients: self-apology for their appearance. Despite their diverse backgrounds, almost every woman she encounters expresses dissatisfaction with their looks, feeling they do not meet an elusive standard of beauty. She contrasts this with a minority of women who exude confidence and do not feel the need to apologize for their appearance. The speaker also shares her own struggles with self-image and the societal pressures of beauty. Through her work, she uses makeup not just as a cosmetic tool, but as a means to help women recognize their own beauty. She concludes with a personal resolution to embrace her own beauty and encourages others to do the same, celebrating the transformative power of self-acceptance and confidence.

Takeaways
  • 🎭 The speaker, a makeup artist and actress, reveals that women from all walks of life apologize for their appearance within seconds of sitting in her chair, highlighting a universal struggle with self-perception.
  • πŸ§β€β™€οΈ There's a small group of women who don't apologize for their looks, including powerful figures and those aware of their mortality, suggesting a correlation between self-acceptance and life experience.
  • πŸͺž Makeup is used as a tool to enhance certain biological cues of attractiveness, but the speaker believes every woman is inherently beautiful with or without it.
  • πŸ’†β€β™€οΈ The speaker views her profession as 'treading in the deep end of a shallow profession', using makeup to help women believe in their own beauty.
  • πŸ“ˆ Makeup serves a therapeutic purpose, allowing women to open up about their insecurities and feel more confident, even if the effect is temporary.
  • πŸ€” The speaker questions societal standards of beauty, which are often unrealistic and unattainable, and ponders what it takes to truly appreciate one's own beauty.
  • πŸ‘΅ The speaker shares stories of elderly women and those who have faced serious health challenges, who exude self-acceptance and don't feel the need to apologize for their appearance.
  • 🌟 The speaker acknowledges her own insecurities when in the makeup chair, showing that she is not immune to the pressures and standards of beauty that she critiques.
  • πŸ’‘ In an attempt to better appreciate her own beauty, the speaker decides to sit in her own makeup chair and challenge her self-deprecating thoughts.
  • πŸ’– The speaker concludes that if makeup can bring her joy, symmetry, or a boost of confidence, she will embrace it as part of her self-expression and self-love.
  • πŸ‘‰ The speaker encourages everyone to believe in their own beauty and to make appointments with themselves to listen and believe in their self-worth.
Q & A
  • What is the common theme in the apologies made by women to the makeup artist?

    -The common theme is self-deprecation and an apology for their appearance, regardless of their age, socioeconomic background, or traditional attractiveness.

  • Why does the makeup artist feel her profession is 'treading in the deep end of a shallow profession'?

    -She feels this way because while makeup is a tool for enhancing physical appearance, she uses it to help women feel beautiful and confident from within, which is a deeper and more meaningful impact.

  • What does the makeup artist believe about every woman who sits in her chair?

    -She believes that every woman who sits in her chair is beautiful with or without makeup, but they often lack self-awareness of their own beauty.

  • How does the makeup artist use makeup to help her clients?

    -She uses makeup as a tool for therapy, helping women open up about their feelings and concerns, and then addresses those through the application of makeup to enhance their natural features.

  • What is the significance of the two groups of women mentioned by the makeup artist who do not apologize?

    -One group consists of powerful women like CEOs or stay-at-home moms who don't measure their self-worth by their appearance. The other group includes women who are aware of their mortality, often having faced significant health challenges, and have learned to appreciate their appearance regardless.

  • Why does the makeup artist decide to sit in her own makeup chair?

    -She decides to sit in her own chair to confront her own insecurities and to practice what she preaches, by trying to appreciate her own beauty and features as she encourages her clients to do.

  • What does the makeup artist believe about the current standard of beauty?

    -She believes that the current standard of beauty is unattainable and unrealistic, as it combines elements of pornography, fashion, and heavily edited images from Photoshop.

  • How does the makeup artist feel when she hears negative comments from her clients about their appearance?

    -She is disheartened because she sees the beauty in each woman, regardless of their perceived flaws, and wants them to recognize their own beauty.

  • What does the makeup artist think about the biological cues of attraction?

    -She acknowledges that biological cues like symmetry, color, and light play a role in attraction and that as a makeup artist, she can enhance these cues to make women feel more attractive and confident.

  • What does the makeup artist suggest as a solution to feeling beautiful?

    -She suggests embracing and enhancing one's natural features with makeup if it brings joy and a sense of symmetry, color, and light to both the face and the mind.

  • How does the makeup artist perceive her role in the transformation of her clients?

    -She sees her role as facilitating a real transformation, not just through makeup, but by helping women to see their own beauty and gain a sense of self-confidence.

  • What is the makeup artist's final message to her audience?

    -Her final message is one of self-acceptance and empowerment. She encourages everyone to believe in their own beauty and to make appointments with themselves to appreciate what they have.

Outlines
00:00
πŸ˜” Women's Apologies to a Makeup Artist

The speaker, a makeup artist and actress, shares her experience of hearing women apologize for their appearance within seconds of sitting in her chair. She notes that this happens regardless of the woman's age, background, or conventional attractiveness. The speaker emphasizes that nearly every woman expresses a sense of inadequacy compared to an unattainable beauty standard. However, she also highlights a small group of women who do not apologizeβ€”those who are either highly successful or acutely aware of their mortality. The speaker uses her skills as a makeup artist not just to enhance physical beauty, but to help women feel more attractive and confident, which in turn allows them to open up and express their concerns.

05:01
🎨 The Power of Makeup and Self-Acceptance

The speaker continues to discuss her profession, explaining that while makeup can play a role in enhancing one's appearance, her real goal is to help women appreciate their own beauty. She shares specific interactions with clients, such as Matir, who despite her own negative self-perceptions, is seen as beautiful by the speaker. The speaker admits her own struggles with self-image and the societal pressures of beauty standards. She also introduces the idea that confronting one's mortality, as seen in her interactions with older or ill clients, can shift one's perspective on self-appreciation. The speaker questions whether such a drastic measure is necessary to feel good about oneself.

10:03
πŸ’ͺ Embracing Beauty and Inner Strength

The speaker concludes by deciding to take her own advice and sit in her own makeup chair, metaphorically speaking, to apply the same acceptance and enhancement techniques she offers her clients. She argues that if makeup can bring balance, joy, or a boost of confidence, then it is a valid and worthwhile endeavor. The speaker commits to recognizing and promoting the inherent beauty in everyone, including herself, and encourages others to do the same. She ends her talk with a message of self-love and acceptance, inviting the audience to join her in celebrating the beauty within themselves and each other.

Mindmap
Keywords
πŸ’‘Beauty Standards
Beauty standards refer to the cultural and societal norms that define what is considered attractive or beautiful. In the video, the speaker discusses how these standards are often unrealistic and unattainable, leading to feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt among women. The speaker emphasizes that almost every woman she encounters apologizes for not meeting these standards, regardless of their actual appearance.
πŸ’‘Self-Acceptance
Self-acceptance is the process of embracing and appreciating oneself, including one's physical appearance, without comparing oneself to external beauty standards. The video's theme revolves around the importance of self-acceptance, as the speaker shares her journey towards recognizing her own beauty and encouraging others to do the same. She uses her experiences as a makeup artist to illustrate how makeup can be a tool for self-expression and confidence, rather than a means to conform to societal expectations.
πŸ’‘Makeup Artist
A makeup artist is a professional who applies makeup to enhance, alter, or improve a person's appearance, often for special occasions, photography, or performance. In the context of the video, the speaker is a makeup artist who uses her skills not just to make women look more attractive but to help them feel more confident and beautiful in their own skin. She views makeup as a therapeutic tool that can facilitate conversations about self-image and self-esteem.
πŸ’‘Confidence
Confidence refers to a person's belief in their own abilities, qualities, and judgments. In the video, the speaker discusses how feelings of self-doubt and the pressure to meet beauty standards can erode a woman's confidence. She emphasizes the transformative power of makeup in boosting a woman's self-esteem, allowing her to stand out and express herself with a newfound sense of self-assurance.
πŸ’‘Apology
In the video, the act of apologizing is used to illustrate the internalized feelings of inadequacy many women experience due to societal beauty standards. The speaker notes that almost every woman she encounters as a makeup artist apologizes for their appearance before the session begins, reflecting a deep-seated belief that they are not good enough as they are. This highlights the pervasive impact of beauty standards on women's self-perception.
πŸ’‘Mortality
Mortality refers to the state of being subject to death. The speaker mentions a group of women who are aware of their own mortality and do not apologize for their appearance. This group includes women who have faced significant health challenges or are of advanced age. Their experiences have often led them to a place of self-acceptance and appreciation for their bodies, regardless of societal standards.
πŸ’‘Biological Cues
Biological cues are innate, instinctive responses that humans have to certain visual or sensory stimuli. In the context of the video, the speaker discusses how makeup can enhance biological cues such as symmetry, color, and light, which are associated with attractiveness. As a makeup artist, she uses these cues to help women feel more attractive and, consequently, more confident.
πŸ’‘Therapy Puppet
The term 'therapy puppet' is used metaphorically in the video to describe the role of makeup in the speaker's work. She views makeup not just as a cosmetic tool but as a means to initiate conversations about self-image and to help women express their feelings and concerns. This metaphor underscores the therapeutic aspect of the makeup application process, where the artist helps clients confront and overcome their insecurities.
πŸ’‘Primordial Senses
Primordial senses refer to the basic, instinctive sensory perceptions that humans have evolved to respond to, such as patterns of symmetry and color that signal health and fertility. The speaker mentions these senses in relation to the visual appeal of makeup, explaining how enhancing these cues can trigger a positive, biological response, contributing to a woman's sense of attractiveness and confidence.
πŸ’‘Intellectuals
Intellectuals are individuals who possess a high level of mental ability, particularly in areas involving reasoning, understanding, and knowledge. In the video, the speaker humorously refers to her audience as a group of intellectuals, suggesting that she is addressing a sophisticated and discerning group. This sets the stage for her to discuss the topic of beauty and self-image in a thoughtful and meaningful way, challenging her audience to consider the deeper implications of societal beauty standards.
πŸ’‘Superficial
Superficial refers to something that is on the surface only and does not have depth or substance. The speaker uses the term to describe her initial perception of her profession as a makeup artist, suggesting that it is often dismissed as a shallow pursuit. However, she challenges this notion by highlighting the profound impact that makeup can have on a woman's self-esteem and self-perception, turning a seemingly superficial activity into a tool for empowerment and self-discovery.
Highlights

The speaker, a makeup artist and actress, reveals that almost every woman she works with apologizes for their appearance within the first 3 seconds of sitting in her chair.

Regardless of age, socioeconomic background, or physical attractiveness, women often feel they don't measure up to societal beauty standards.

A small group of women, including CEOs and stay-at-home moms, do not apologize for their looks; they are secure and don't measure self-worth by appearance.

The speaker expresses awe for these confident women and humorously suggests they take a bathroom break as they don't need to hear the talk.

There's another group of women aware of their mortality who also don't apologize, hinting at a deeper understanding of self-worth.

Women often seek makeup appointments out of dissatisfaction with their looks, hoping for a transformative experience.

The speaker believes that while makeup can enhance attractiveness and confidence, it is the least of what she does in her sessions.

Makeup is described as a tool to help women feel more beautiful, but the speaker sees beauty in every woman regardless of makeup.

The speaker uses the term 'therapy puppet' to illustrate how makeup helps women open up about their feelings and concerns.

A transformation occurs when women see themselves in a new light after the makeup session, even if it's temporary.

The speaker counters negative self-perceptions by pointing out unique and beautiful features in her clients.

Despite her professional perspective, the speaker admits to feeling inadequate and comparing herself to unrealistic beauty standards.

The speaker humorously acknowledges the pressure of unrealistic beauty standards, which are a mix of porn, fashion, and Photoshop.

She questions what it will take to appreciate our own beauty, reflecting on whether it requires a confrontation with mortality.

The speaker shares stories of two women, aged 96 and a recent cancer survivor, who exude self-love and positivity despite their circumstances.

The speaker decides to challenge her own negative self-perceptions by using makeup to bring joy and confidence, rather than hiding flaws.

She concludes by committing to seeing and believing in the beauty of all women and encourages others to do the same.

The talk ends on a powerful note, with the speaker embracing her role in helping women feel beautiful and confident.

Transcripts
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