Why I Was Afraid to Disclose My ADHD (ft. Dr. Patrick LaCount)

How to ADHD
26 Apr 202321:17
EducationalLearning
32 Likes 10 Comments

TLDRIn this video, the host interviews Dr. Patrick lecount, a clinical psychologist and researcher specializing in ADHD. Despite his expertise, Dr. lecount struggled with the personal revelation of his own ADHD diagnosis, grappling with feelings of shame and the fear of how it might impact his academic and professional life. The discussion delves into the internal and external pressures that kept him from disclosing his condition, even in environments that openly discuss ADHD. The conversation highlights the challenges faced by individuals with ADHD in high-pressure environments like academia, where productivity is paramount. Dr. lecount shares his journey of acceptance, the toll of hiding his ADHD, and the liberating moment when he began to openly discuss his experiences. The video also touches on the potential for academia to become more accommodating to neurodiversity and the importance of self-acceptance and mental health. It concludes with advice for others who may be hesitant to disclose their ADHD, emphasizing the importance of considering both the potential risks and benefits of openness.

Takeaways
  • 🎓 Dr. Patrick, a researcher and clinical psychologist, specializes in ADHD and has personal experience with the condition, which he initially kept private due to internal shame and professional concerns.
  • 🤔 The stigma associated with ADHD in academia and the fear of being judged or seen as less productive contributed to Dr. Patrick's reluctance to disclose his diagnosis.
  • 🧐 Dr. Patrick experienced self-doubt about his ADHD diagnosis, questioning whether his struggles were genuine or if he was just using ADHD as an excuse.
  • 📚 He was diagnosed with ADHD during his first year of college after a professor suggested he get checked out, which led to a realization and a way forward.
  • 🙅‍♂️ After receiving the diagnosis, Dr. Patrick chose not to tell anyone, processing the information about himself alone and without support.
  • 💪 He compensated for his ADHD by working tirelessly, often overcompensating to hide any signs of his condition, especially in a competitive academic environment.
  • 🤝 The first person Dr. Patrick told about his ADHD was his father, who responded with curiosity and validation, which made him feel lighter and more open to sharing with others.
  • 🤔 Dr. Patrick reflects on the potential benefits of disclosing his ADHD in academia, but ultimately felt that the costs to his mental health and personal well-being were too high.
  • 🌟 He emphasizes the importance of self-acceptance and integrating ADHD into one's identity, rather than letting it define or overshadow one's self-worth.
  • 📈 Dr. Patrick has since incorporated his ADHD into his professional life, using his personal experiences to inform his practice and help others with ADHD.
  • 🌱 He encourages others who are struggling with ADHD to consider the potential benefits of disclosure and to seek support, despite the perceived threats or challenges.
Q & A
  • What is the main topic of discussion in the interview?

    -The main topic of discussion is the personal and professional challenges faced by Dr. Patrick, a researcher and clinical psychologist specializing in ADHD, who has ADHD himself and his journey of coming to terms with his condition and disclosing it to others.

  • Why did Dr. Patrick initially feel uncomfortable disclosing his ADHD?

    -Dr. Patrick felt uncomfortable disclosing his ADHD due to internal shame, concerns about objectivity in his research, and the perception that ADHD could be seen as a disorder of poor productivity, which could be detrimental in an academic setting.

  • What were some of the internal struggles Dr. Patrick faced regarding his ADHD?

    -Dr. Patrick struggled with self-doubt about his diagnosis, questioned his accomplishments due to the use of medication, and experienced a sense of shame and fear of not being seen as 'ADHD enough' by others.

  • When was Dr. Patrick diagnosed with ADHD?

    -Dr. Patrick was diagnosed with ADHD towards the end of his first year of college.

  • What was Dr. Patrick's initial reaction after receiving his ADHD diagnosis?

    -Dr. Patrick did not tell anyone about his diagnosis and processed the information about himself alone. He initially saw the diagnosis as an opportunity to improve his academic performance without considering the need to share it with others.

  • How did Dr. Patrick compensate for his ADHD during his academic career?

    -Dr. Patrick compensated by working tirelessly, being in the lab on most weekends, and preparing extensively for the next week to mask his ADHD symptoms and maintain a high level of productivity.

  • What was the turning point for Dr. Patrick in deciding to disclose his ADHD?

    -The turning point was reaching a breaking point where achievements and hard work were no longer sustainable, experiencing burnout, and reflecting on his life's purpose during the COVID-19 pandemic.

  • How did Dr. Patrick's father react when he first disclosed his ADHD?

    -His father reacted positively, with curiosity and validation, which made Dr. Patrick feel more comfortable and less alone in his journey.

  • What advice does Dr. Patrick have for individuals who are unsure about disclosing their ADHD?

    -Dr. Patrick suggests considering both the potential threats and benefits of disclosure, and possibly starting by sharing with one person to see how it feels and to gain a better understanding of the impact on oneself.

  • How does Dr. Patrick view ADHD in relation to his identity now?

    -Dr. Patrick no longer sees ADHD as something that defines him or something that he needs to hide. He acknowledges the gray area and is more open to exploring the deeper questions about how ADHD impacts his life.

  • What is the role of Academia in Dr. Patrick's experience with ADHD?

    -Academia played a significant role as it added pressure to be highly productive and competitive, which Dr. Patrick felt could be incompatible with his ADHD. He also experienced a lack of support and understanding within the academic community regarding mental health conditions.

Outlines
00:00
🎓 The Struggles of an ADHD Researcher in Academia

Dr. Patrick lecount, a researcher and clinical psychologist specializing in ADHD, shares his personal and professional journey with ADHD. Despite his expertise, he initially felt internal shame and was reluctant to disclose his condition due to academic stigma and fear of appearing biased or unproductive. His diagnosis came late in college, and he chose not to share it, even with close colleagues, due to the competitive nature of academia and the pressure to maintain a high level of productivity.

05:01
🤔 Fear and Identity: Disclosing ADHD in Personal and Professional Circles

Dr. lecount discusses the fear and challenges he faced in disclosing his ADHD, even to close friends and in academic settings. He talks about the fear of not being seen as 'ADHD enough' and the internal struggle of reconciling his diagnosis with his accomplishments. His decision to not disclose his ADHD was influenced by the competitive environment in grad school and the perceived threat it could pose to his career.

10:03
🔥 The Toll of Overcompensation and Burnout

The narrative explores the personal cost of trying to outrun and outwork ADHD, leading to burnout. Dr. lecount shares how he compensated for his ADHD by working excessively, which impacted his personal life and relationships. He highlights the moment he reached a breaking point, realizing that his achievements came at a high personal cost and that he needed to address his mental health.

15:04
🌟 Coming to Terms and Sharing the ADHD Journey

Dr. lecount describes his eventual decision to start sharing his ADHD story, beginning with telling his father, which was a validating experience. He talks about the relief he felt after sharing his struggles and how it allowed him to explore deeper questions about the impact of ADHD on his life, including his career, personal relationships, and potential future family.

20:05
💡 Advice for Navigating ADHD Disclosure in High-Pressure Environments

In the final paragraph, Dr. lecount offers advice for individuals struggling with whether to disclose their ADHD. He suggests weighing the potential threats against the possible positive outcomes of disclosure and encourages trying out sharing with one person to see the impact. He also discusses the possibility of academia becoming more ADHD-friendly and the importance of embracing one's true self.

Mindmap
Keywords
💡ADHD
Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is a neurodevelopmental disorder characterized by symptoms such as inattention, impulsivity, and hyperactivity. In the video, Dr. Patrick lecount discusses his personal experience with ADHD, his journey of self-discovery, and the challenges he faced in academia due to the condition. His story provides insight into the stigma and internal struggles associated with ADHD, as well as the impact it can have on one's personal and professional life.
💡Internal Shame
Internal shame refers to the feelings of guilt or embarrassment one experiences within themselves, often related to perceived personal shortcomings or societal expectations. Dr. lecount mentions internal shame as a reason for not initially disclosing his ADHD, reflecting the stigma and personal struggle that can accompany such a diagnosis.
💡Academic Pressure
Academic pressure denotes the stress and expectations placed on individuals within an educational setting, often related to performance, productivity, and achievement. The video discusses how the high-pressure environment of academia can exacerbate the challenges faced by individuals with ADHD, as productivity is highly valued and any deviation from this can lead to feelings of inadequacy or shame.
💡Self-Doubt
Self-doubt is the state of uncertainty and lack of confidence in one's own abilities or decisions. Dr. lecount expresses self-doubt regarding his ADHD diagnosis, questioning whether his struggles were genuine or if he was just using ADHD as an excuse for his difficulties. This concept is central to the narrative as it illustrates the internal conflict and the psychological impact of living with ADHD.
💡Productivity
Productivity refers to the efficiency of an individual's work or the rate at which tasks are completed. In the context of the video, productivity is highlighted as a key value in academia and a metric by which individuals are often judged. Dr. lecount's ADHD sometimes affected his productivity, leading to further internal conflict and a sense of inadequacy.
💡Burnout
Burnout is a state of chronic physical and emotional exhaustion often caused by prolonged stress. The video script mentions burnout as a consequence of Dr. lecount's relentless drive to overcompensate for his ADHD symptoms by working excessively hard, which eventually led to a breaking point.
💡Disclosure
Disclosure, in the context of the video, refers to the act of revealing or sharing one's ADHD diagnosis with others. Dr. lecount's decision to disclose his ADHD was influenced by the fear of jeopardizing his academic and professional opportunities, as well as the societal stigma associated with the condition.
💡Neurodivergent Community
The neurodivergent community encompasses individuals whose neurological development and functioning differ from what is considered standard, including those with ADHD, autism, dyslexia, and other conditions. The video highlights the experiences and challenges faced by members of this community, particularly in high-pressure environments like academia.
💡Mental Health
Mental health refers to the state of an individual's emotional, psychological, and social well-being. The video discusses the importance of addressing mental health issues, such as ADHD, and the societal progress that has been made in openly discussing these topics. Dr. lecount's journey with ADHD is a testament to the complexities and nuances of mental health.
💡Stigma
Stigma is a mark of disgrace or a negative stereotype associated with a particular circumstance, quality, or person. In the video, the stigma surrounding ADHD is a significant theme, affecting Dr. lecount's willingness to disclose his condition and his perception of himself within the academic community.
💡Identity
Identity refers to the characteristics and qualities that make up an individual's sense of self. The video explores Dr. lecount's struggle with incorporating his ADHD into his identity, reflecting on the process of acceptance and the impact of societal and personal perceptions on self-concept.
Highlights

Dr. Patrick lecount, a researcher and clinical psychologist, discusses his expertise in ADHD and the challenges he faced in disclosing his own diagnosis.

Dr. lecount experienced internal shame and discomfort in discussing his ADHD, even within a supportive academic and professional community.

The stigma within academia against studying a condition one personally has, as it may be perceived to compromise objectivity.

Dr. lecount's struggle with the productivity expectations in academia and how ADHD can sometimes be viewed as a disorder of poor productivity.

His personal journey with self-doubt about his ADHD diagnosis and the impact of medication on his accomplishments.

The timing of Dr. lecount's ADHD diagnosis during his first year of college and the initial reluctance to share this with others.

The pressure to maintain a professional image in grad school and the fear of appearing weak by disclosing ADHD.

Dr. lecount's realization that his ADHD was a significant part of his identity and the difficulty in accepting this.

The emotional and mental toll of constantly compensating for ADHD symptoms and the fear of confronting the reality of his condition.

The decision to disclose his ADHD to his father and the positive, validating response that encouraged him to share more openly.

Dr. lecount's reflections on the potential benefits of disclosing ADHD in academia and the competitive nature of academic positions.

His ultimate decision to leave academia due to the personal cost of maintaining productivity at the expense of his well-being.

The transformative impact of sharing his ADHD story publicly and the sense of relief and acceptance that followed.

Dr. lecount's advice for others struggling with the decision to disclose their ADHD, emphasizing the importance of weighing the potential benefits.

The introduction of One Dream, an online learning platform offering a wide range of courses, including American Sign Language, beneficial for neurodivergent individuals.

The personal application of learning ASL to better communicate with a deaf family member and for potential communication support within the neurodivergent community.

A call to action for listeners to consider the importance of disclosure and the support available through Patreon for individuals facing similar challenges.

Information on Dr. lecount's practice, offering therapy and diagnostic assessments in over 30 states, and upcoming virtual groups for mindfulness-based interventions.

Transcripts
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