Having SEX for the FIRST TIME? Here's what you NEED TO KNOW before you do it! | Sex Education

Glamrs
14 Jan 202207:20
EducationalLearning
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TLDRApurupa, a sexuality educator, emphasizes the importance of the five C's for a safe and consensual sexual experience: Comfort, Conversation, Condoms, Consent, and Care. Comfort is paramount, ensuring a safe space and mutual emotional well-being. Open and honest communication about expectations, concerns, and ongoing preferences is essential. Condoms are highlighted as crucial for protection against STIs and unwanted pregnancies, with advice on proper storage and usage. Consent is a non-negotiable aspect, requiring ongoing verification and respect for individual boundaries. Lastly, care involves attentiveness to emotional safety and responsiveness to one's partner's needs and signals. By internalizing these principles, individuals can foster a positive and respectful sexual relationship.

Takeaways
  • πŸ›Œ Comfort is crucial: Ensure you and your partner are comfortable physically, emotionally, and with the location for the sexual experience.
  • πŸ—£οΈ Open Communication: Engage in conversations about expectations, concerns, and preferences before, during, and after the act.
  • πŸ“’ Check-ins are key: Regularly check in with your partner to ensure ongoing comfort and consent throughout the sexual encounter.
  • πŸ’¬ Consent is mandatory: Always seek and respect consent from your partner, and remember that it can be withdrawn at any time.
  • 🚫 No means no: Recognize that any sexual activity without consent is assault and is not acceptable.
  • πŸ›‘οΈ Use protection: Utilize condoms to prevent STIs and unwanted pregnancies, and ensure they are stored properly and used correctly.
  • πŸ“… Freshness matters: Use a fresh condom and check the expiry date to avoid potential condom failure.
  • 🧼 Practice safe handling: Learn how to properly put on a condom without causing damage, and avoid using your teeth to open the package.
  • πŸ’• Emotional safety first: Be attentive to your partner's body language and emotional state to ensure a caring and safe experience.
  • πŸ” Be aware of non-verbal cues: Pay attention to subtle changes in your partner's responses to gauge their comfort and willingness.
  • 🧠 Memorize the 5 C's: Commit to memory the principles of Comfort, Conversation, Condoms, Consent, and Care for a positive sexual experience.
Q & A
  • What are the five C's mentioned by Apurupa for having a safe and comfortable sexual experience?

    -The five C's are Comfort, Conversation, Condoms, Consent, and Care.

  • Why is it important to feel comfortable with your partner during sex?

    -Feeling comfortable with your partner is crucial because it ensures that both individuals are at ease, can communicate effectively, and prioritize each other's well-being throughout the experience.

  • What should be the nature of the conversation before engaging in sexual activity?

    -The conversation should involve discussing expectations, concerns, fears, and any other relevant topics to ensure mutual understanding and comfort.

  • Why is it necessary to have a conversation during the act of sex?

    -Having a conversation during sex allows for checking in with each other, ensuring comfort, and making any necessary adjustments to maintain a pleasurable and consensual experience.

  • What are some key points to remember about using condoms?

    -Key points include using a fresh condom, storing it properly to prevent damage, checking the expiry date, knowing how to use it correctly, and avoiding damage such as tearing with teeth.

  • Why is consent an ongoing process during sexual activity?

    -Consent is an ongoing process because it ensures that both parties continue to feel comfortable and are actively participating in the act. It allows for the possibility of changing one's mind at any point.

  • What does Apurupa mean when she says that 'any form of sexual activity without consent is not sex at all'?

    -Apurupa emphasizes that without consent, the act becomes an assault, which is both punishable by law and a violation of a person's rights and autonomy.

  • How can the principle of caring contribute to a positive sexual experience?

    -Caring contributes to a positive sexual experience by fostering emotional safety, attentiveness to body language and responses, and ensuring that both partners are present and engaged in the moment.

  • What should be the attitude towards experimenting with each other's bodies during sex?

    -The attitude should be one of mutual respect, consent, and care, allowing for fun and exploration while maintaining a focus on each other's comfort and well-being.

  • Why is it important to prioritize comfort not just before, but also during and after sex?

    -Prioritizing comfort at all times ensures a positive and respectful sexual experience, allowing for open communication, and addressing any concerns or needs that may arise.

  • How can the five C's help both partners in a sexual relationship?

    -The five C's provide a framework for communication, consent, protection, and mutual respect, which can enhance understanding, safety, and pleasure for both partners.

Outlines
00:00
πŸ˜€ First Time Sex: The 5 C's

Apurupa, a sexuality educator, discusses the essential considerations before engaging in sexual activity for the first time. She introduces the five C's: comfort, conversation, condoms, consent, and care. Comfort is emphasized as crucial in choosing a partner, setting, and maintaining a pace that respects both individuals' boundaries. Conversation is highlighted as a vital part of the process, both before and during the act, to ensure mutual understanding, check-in regularly, and address any concerns. Condoms are stressed as the primary protection against STIs and unwanted pregnancies, with advice on proper storage, usage, and the importance of a fresh condom. Consent is a critical aspect, requiring ongoing communication and the understanding that it can be withdrawn at any time. Lastly, care involves being attentive to each other's emotional and physical well-being, ensuring a safe and positive experience.

05:02
πŸ’¬ Consent and Emotional Safety in Sexual Activity

This paragraph delves deeper into the importance of consent, emphasizing the necessity of obtaining and giving consent at every stage of sexual activity. Regular check-ins are advised to ensure that both parties are comfortable and consenting. The right to say no at any point, even immediately before penetration, is asserted, and it is made clear that without consent, any sexual activity is considered assault. The paragraph also encourages the exploration of sexual expression within the framework of mutual care and emotional safety, paying attention to non-verbal cues and responsiveness. The five C's are reiterated as a guideline to enhance the sexual experience while prioritizing the well-being of all involved.

Mindmap
Keywords
πŸ’‘Comfort
Comfort refers to a state of physical ease and mental well-being. In the context of the video, it emphasizes the importance of feeling at ease with one's partner, the environment, and the pace of sexual activity. The video suggests that comfort should be prioritized before, during, and after the act to ensure a positive experience for both individuals involved.
πŸ’‘Conversation
Conversation is the act of talking in an informal way to exchange ideas or feelings. The video stresses the necessity of open communication before, during, and after sexual activity. This includes discussing expectations, concerns, and preferences, as well as checking in with one another for consent and comfort levels. Effective conversation helps to build trust and ensures that both parties are on the same page.
πŸ’‘Condoms
Condoms are a type of barrier device used during sexual activity to reduce the risk of sexually transmitted infections (STIs) and unintended pregnancies. The video highlights the importance of using condoms correctly and consistently. It also advises checking the expiration date and storing them properly to maintain their effectiveness, which is crucial for safeguarding one's sexual health.
πŸ’‘Consent
Consent is the voluntary and informed agreement to engage in a particular activity. The video emphasizes that consent is a fundamental aspect of any sexual encounter. It must be freely given, specific to the sexual activity, and can be withdrawn at any time. The video also clarifies that consent is an ongoing process that requires regular check-ins and clear communication throughout the act.
πŸ’‘Care
Care denotes the provision of what is necessary for the health, welfare, maintenance, and protection of someone. In the video, care is presented as a core principle of sexual activity, which involves being attentive to one's partner's emotional and physical well-being. It involves respecting boundaries, being sensitive to non-verbal cues, and creating a safe and supportive environment for the sexual experience.
πŸ’‘Sexuality Educator
A sexuality educator is a professional who provides information, education, and support related to sexuality, sexual health, and relationships. In the script, Apurupa introduces herself as a sexuality educator, setting the context for her expertise and the valuable insights she shares throughout the video on the topic of first-time sexual experiences.
πŸ’‘Five C's
The Five C's is a mnemonic device introduced in the video to help remember the key aspects to consider before engaging in sexual activity. It stands for Comfort, Conversation, Condoms, Consent, and Care. This framework serves as a guide to ensure a safe, consensual, and pleasurable experience for both parties involved in a sexual encounter.
πŸ’‘STIs (Sexually Transmitted Infections)
STIs are infections that spread primarily through sexual contact. The video mentions STIs in the context of using condoms as a preventive measure. It underscores the risk of contracting STIs and the importance of practicing safe sex to protect oneself and one's partner from these infections.
πŸ’‘Unwanted Pregnancies
Unwanted pregnancies refer to instances where a pregnancy occurs without being planned or desired by the individuals involved. The video discusses the use of condoms as a method to prevent such pregnancies. It highlights the significance of contraception in family planning and reproductive health.
πŸ’‘Emotional Safety
Emotional safety is the state of being where individuals feel secure and free from fear of judgment or negative consequences when expressing their thoughts and feelings. In the context of the video, emotional safety is linked to the importance of caring for one's partner during sexual activity. It involves being aware of and responsive to each other's emotional needs and creating a supportive atmosphere.
πŸ’‘Body Language
Body language is the non-verbal communication of thoughts, feelings, or attitudes through body movements and postures. The video mentions being aware of one's partner's body language as a means of understanding their comfort level and consent during sexual activity. It suggests that paying attention to non-verbal cues can enhance communication and ensure a more positive and consensual experience.
Highlights

The five C's formula for a positive sexual experience includes comfort, conversation, condoms, consent, and care.

Comfort is essential; it should be with someone you feel good with and in a location that is suitable for both parties.

Open conversation before, during, and after the act is crucial for understanding expectations, addressing concerns, and ensuring mutual comfort.

Condoms are the only protection against STIs and unwanted pregnancies; always use a fresh one and store it properly.

Consent must be given and received at all times, and it's important to regularly check in with your partner during the act.

Caring for each other's emotional safety is vital; be aware of body language and responsiveness to ensure mutual enjoyment.

Sex should prioritize the comfort of both partners at all times, including before, during, and after the act.

Pornography often misrepresents sexual communication; real conversations should happen during the act to ensure comfort and pleasure.

It's important to practice using a condom to avoid mistakes in the heat of the moment.

Consent can be withdrawn at any point, and it is essential that it is respected; without consent, sexual activity is assault.

Experimentation and fun are part of sex, but they should always be grounded in the core principle of caring for each other's well-being.

Remembering and internalizing the 5 C's can greatly assist both individuals in ensuring a positive and safe sexual experience.

The importance of discussing fears and desires before engaging in sexual activity to establish a mutual understanding.

The necessity of checking in with your partner during the act to ensure ongoing consent and comfort.

Storing condoms in a place with room and air circulation to prevent the latex from eroding over time.

Reading the expiry date on condoms to avoid using a potentially ineffective one.

Avoiding tearing the condom with teeth to prevent damage and ensure its effectiveness as a barrier.

The right to say no at any point during sexual activity, even right before penetration, and the importance of respecting that decision.

The significance of aftercare, including checking in with your partner post-act to address any needs or desires.

Transcripts
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