How You Know YOU Aren't HER First Choice & Why You Should Dump Her if You Aren't

Entrepreneurs in Cars
22 Oct 202006:48
EducationalLearning
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TLDRIn this video, the speaker delves into the dynamics of attraction and desire in relationships, addressing the concern of men being a 'second choice' for women. He outlines behaviors that indicate a woman's genuine burning desire for a man, such as prompt communication and initiating intimacy, and contrasts these with signs of indifference, often leading to unsatisfying long-term relationships. The speaker emphasizes the importance of choosing a partner who reciprocates strong interest, advocating for self-improvement and discernment in romantic pursuits.

Takeaways
  • πŸ€” The video discusses how to identify if a man is a woman's first choice in relationships, particularly in the context of attraction and desire.
  • πŸ” It introduces the term 'alpha widowed' to describe women who pine for a man they saw as higher value but couldn't secure a relationship with.
  • βœ… The speaker provides actionable advice for early screening in relationships to determine if a woman has a genuine burning desire for a man.
  • πŸ“š Reference is made to a book that includes a section on desire, with a chapter on '20 red flags' offered for free to those who join the email list.
  • πŸ’‘ The concept of 'genuine burning desire' is highlighted as essential for women when choosing a partner.
  • 🚫 The video suggests that women with high desire for a man will exhibit certain behaviors early in dating, such as being punctual, responsive, and showing interest in the man's life.
  • πŸ›‘ In contrast, indifference in a relationship can lead to behaviors like rescheduling dates, giving less than receiving, and becoming confrontational.
  • πŸ”„ The speaker warns against long-term relationships or marriages where a woman does not have a strong desire for the man, as they can lead to issues like a sexless marriage.
  • πŸ“‰ The video emphasizes that the return on investment (ROI) in a relationship is low if the woman does not have a strong interest and desire for the man.
  • πŸ“ˆ The advice is to 'chase excellence' and to choose women who reciprocate the desire and interest in the relationship.
  • πŸ“˜ The speaker promotes his upcoming book as a resource for men, filled with lessons and conversations that are considered valuable but often not discussed.
Q & A
  • What is the main topic discussed in the video?

    -The main topic discussed in the video is the interactions between men and women, particularly focusing on attraction, desire, and how to determine if one is a woman's first choice in a relationship.

  • What does the term 'alpha widowed' refer to in the context of the video?

    -In the context of the video, 'alpha widowed' refers to women who are still emotionally attached to a man they saw as higher value but were unable to form a lasting relationship with, often leading to them settling for someone else.

  • What is the author's advice for men who want to avoid being someone's second choice in a relationship?

    -The author advises men to look for signs of genuine burning desire from women, such as timely responses, active engagement, and initiation of intimacy, as indicators that they might be a woman's first choice.

  • What behaviors does the author suggest are indicative of a woman having a genuine burning desire for a man?

    -The author suggests behaviors such as showing up on time, responding quickly to texts, entering the man's frame, complimenting his life, asking questions to get to know him, buying random gifts, and initiating intimacy as signs of genuine burning desire.

  • What is the difference between the behaviors of a woman who is indifferent and one who has genuine burning desire, according to the video?

    -A woman who is indifferent may reschedule and cancel dates, ask for more than she gives, become confrontational, take long to respond to texts or calls, and show low interest in the bedroom. In contrast, a woman with genuine burning desire will be enthusiastic, responsive, and actively engaged in the relationship.

  • What does the author mean by 'competency test' in the context of relationships?

    -A 'competency test' refers to situations where a woman tests a man's abilities or skills to assess if he is the best partner she could have, often happening when she is not completely convinced of his value as a partner.

  • What advice does the author give for men who are considering marriage?

    -The author advises men to only consider marriage with women who have a strong genuine burning desire for them, emphasizing the importance of mutual desire and interest for a successful long-term relationship.

  • How does the author suggest men can tell if a woman is not highly interested in them?

    -The author suggests that men can tell if a woman is not highly interested by her slow responses to messages and calls, lack of effort in her appearance when meeting, and low interest in the bedroom.

  • What is the significance of the author offering a free chapter from his book to those who join his email list?

    -The significance is to provide additional value and insights to those interested in the author's teachings, while also building a community and audience for his upcoming book release.

  • What is the author's final recommendation for men in terms of choosing a partner?

    -The author's final recommendation is for men to choose women who choose them, emphasizing the importance of mutual attraction and desire, and to chase excellence rather than chasing women.

Outlines
00:00
πŸ” Understanding Women's Desire in Relationships

The speaker addresses the common concern of men feeling like they're not a woman's first choice in relationships. He discusses the concept of 'alpha widowing,' where women may still desire a man who doesn't reciprocate their feelings. The speaker offers actionable advice for early screening to determine if a woman has a genuine burning desire for a man, indicating behaviors such as prompt communication, showing up for dates prepared and enthusiastic, and initiating intimacy. He contrasts this with indifference behaviors, which may include rescheduling dates, being confrontational, and lacking interest in the bedroom, often seen in long-term relationships where the man is not the woman's first choice.

05:00
πŸ’” The Risks of Settling in Relationships

In this paragraph, the speaker emphasizes the importance of choosing a partner who genuinely desires you, especially when considering marriage. He advises against entering into long-term commitments with women who show little interest, as the long-term benefits are not favorable. The speaker also mentions his upcoming book, which will provide further insights and advice on this topic. He encourages men to join his email list to receive updates and a free chapter on red flags to watch out for in relationships. The speaker concludes by reiterating the importance of being chosen by women and to pursue excellence rather than chasing uninterested women.

Mindmap
Keywords
πŸ’‘Alpha Widowed
The term 'alpha widowed' refers to a situation where a woman is emotionally attached to a man who she perceives as having higher value but who does not reciprocate her feelings. In the video, it is used to describe women who may settle for men who are not their first choice because they are still longing for someone else who they could not 'lock down.'
πŸ’‘Desire
Desire in this context is the strong emotional and physical attraction a woman feels towards a man. The video emphasizes the importance of a woman having a genuine burning desire for a man, which is indicative of her considering him as her first choice. It is contrasted with indifference, which is a sign of settling for someone who is not a top preference.
πŸ’‘First Choice
'First choice' denotes the ideal or most preferred option in a given situation. In the video, the speaker discusses behaviors that suggest a woman considers a man as her first choice, such as showing up on time, responding quickly, and initiating intimacy.
πŸ’‘Indifference
Indifference in the video script refers to a lack of interest or enthusiasm. It is used to describe the behavior of women who may settle for a partner who is not their first choice, exhibiting behaviors like rescheduling dates, being slow to respond, and showing low interest in the relationship.
πŸ’‘Settling
Settling is the act of accepting a less desirable option out of a sense of resignation or lack of better alternatives. The video talks about women who may settle for men who are not their first choice, leading to potential dissatisfaction in long-term relationships or marriages.
πŸ’‘Beta Pleb
The term 'beta pleb' is used in the video to describe a man who is not considered a woman's first choice, often implying a lack of dominance or attractiveness. It is contrasted with the 'alpha' male, who is seen as more desirable.
πŸ’‘Competency Test
A competency test, as mentioned in the video, is when a woman tests a man's abilities or skills to assess if he is the best partner she can have. This can occur more frequently in relationships where the woman is not completely satisfied with her choice, such as when she settles for someone who is not her first choice.
πŸ’‘Sexless Marriage
A 'sexless marriage' refers to a marriage where there is a lack of sexual intimacy between the partners. In the video, it is mentioned as a potential outcome of a relationship where the woman does not have a strong desire for her partner, leading to disinterest and dissatisfaction.
πŸ’‘Initiate Intimacy
Initiating intimacy is the act of starting a romantic or sexual interaction. The video uses this term to describe one of the behaviors that indicate a woman's strong desire for a man, suggesting that she considers him her first choice.
πŸ’‘Chase Excellence
The phrase 'chase excellence' is used in the video as advice for men to pursue self-improvement and personal growth rather than chasing after women who do not reciprocate their interest. It suggests that men should focus on becoming the best version of themselves to attract women who genuinely desire them.
πŸ’‘ROI (Return on Investment)
In the context of the video, ROI refers to the metaphorical return one gets from a relationship or marriage. The speaker warns against entering long-term relationships with women who do not have a strong desire for the man, as the 'ROI' or satisfaction and happiness gained from such a union is likely to be low.
Highlights

The video discusses the interactions between men and women with attraction and desire.

It addresses the concern of men being not the first choice for women in relationships.

The concept of 'alpha widowing' is introduced, where women pine for a man they couldn't lock down.

Actionable advice is provided for early screening in relationships.

The book 'Desire' is mentioned, offering a section on identifying genuine burning desire in women.

A free chapter on '20 Red Flags' is offered to those on the email list.

Genuine burning desire in women is characterized by early dating behaviors like timely responses and compliments.

Women with high desire will enter the man's frame and show interest in getting to know him.

They may initiate intimacy and show enthusiasm for the relationship.

Indifference in women may lead to behaviors like rescheduling dates and confrontational attitudes.

Indifference can result in a sexless marriage and lack of effort in the relationship.

Women may competency test men when they are unsure of their choice.

Slow response to texts and calls is a sign of low interest.

A lack of questions about the man indicates a woman's disinterest.

Women may say 'I don't do that' in the bedroom, implying they would with someone they desire more.

The advice to choose women who have a strong genuine burning desire for you is emphasized.

The upcoming book is said to be a resource for men, covering lessons learned from coaching.

The speaker encourages men to chase excellence, not women with low interest.

Transcripts
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